"You never know what worse luck your bad luck has saved you from.". ", "Unless your name is Google, stop acting like you know everything. First, try to stay calm and collected. Not only do you make your friend or foe feel small, but you make it known that youre just too smart for a jab like that even to hit you in the first place. , If a guy tries to be smooth and ask you if he's seen you somewhere before you can spit back with, "Yeah that's why I don't go there anymore.". Before we start, dude, you've got something on your chin no, not that one nope, keep going. Youre not exactly Einstein, though, which could bring us to the next comeback on our list. You dont want to seem rude, so maybe you should ask some follow-up questions as such. Nature is beautiful and so am I. Listen closely and think of a way to make the other person look foolish. [Read: How to learn to be witty and win over everyone in the room] 1. Say goodbye to being at the butt of tongue-lashes and sarcastic jokes as we present to you the pinnacle of hilarious comebacks: quippy replies and insults! ", "I didn't meant to push all your buttons, I was trying to find the mute. Good Comebacks You Can Use In An Argument Today Roses are red, violets are blue, I have 5 fingers, the 3rd ones for you. Please continue while I take notes.". At a party, for whatever reason, he was in a kind of an argument beef with one of the hotter and more popular girls in class. "When somebody says that you are wrong say, 'You're entitled to your incorrect opinion.'". Ur so fat Thanos had to clap to get rid of you ", If you catch someone talking behind your back you can confront them and say, "My back is not voicemail, you can say it to my face. ", "They used to be called jumpolines until your mom got on one." [Chorus] If I'm lucky I'll meet ya, flipside of the graveyard . If you're in a crunch for St. Patrick's Day and need something glowing with green, here is a . Why not take today off? ", Next time a guy says, "I think I could make you happy." But if you find yourself in a situation where someone is trying to put you down, remember that a witty comeback can sometimes be the best defense. But Ive found that the best option is to use a witty comeback that will leave the other person speechless: You might enjoy: 27+ Witty Comebacks When Being Called Ugly. Well done, you managed to deliver the perfect insult or smartass line. I would love to insult you, but I wouldnt do as well as nature did, 50. "God gave men both a penis and a brain, but unfortunately not enough blood supply to run both at the same time.". The only reason Im fat is because a tiny body couldnt store all this personality.[Read: How to be funny and make people love your company], 29. Has humiliating yourself in public ever stopped you? If somebody accuses you of being nasty Here are some of the best comebacks when someone laughs at you: Of course, its always best to avoid getting into arguments with others. How else could you understand me? ", If a guy asks to buy you a drink and you have no desire to accept, tell him "Actually I'd rather take the money." Dont go down that road. Smartass quotes. ", Cocky guy getting to ya? ", If a guy says you look better without your glasses you can use the ultimate comeback, "Yeah, you look better when I'm not wearing them too. Hopefully he'll get the hint. You cant imagine how much happiness you can bring by leaving the room. ", "Okay now try again using your big boy/girl words. Here are a few clap-backs for the average short stack that may catch your interest, along with the attention of others without even trying. You are like a software update. Here, then, are 30 of the rudest comebacks of all time. Another comeback that doesn't miss: "Oooh, you wanna kiss me so bad." If someone is angryor obsessedenough with you, the insinuation that they in fact harbor affection towards you is all it. Want to roast a guy who says you take his breath away? Keep rolling your eyes, you might eventually find a brain. You hear that? ", If a teacher is mid sentence and says, "Sorry I lost my train of thought" you can easily reply with the good comeback of, "Don't worry, there were no important passengers on board." Some days you eat salads and go to the gym. Keep your voice steady, avoid sounding too pleased with yourself, and deliver the line with a straight face. ", "Stupidity isn't a crime so you're free to go. Its a bully mentality, they dont like it when it comes back around at them. Its cute when you try to talk all clever, awww. Because youre behaving like a b**ch! I cant wait to spend my whole life without you. No one can match your energy, even if they want to bring you down. ", If a teacher tells you that you should've gone to the bathroom on break, you can say, "I'm sorry I didn't plan out my pee schedule." Ive been called worse things by better men. You go first. ", "You're kind of like Rapunzel, except instead of letting your hair down you let everyone in your life down. Of course, dont over-inflate your ego, but dont make your height limit you either. ", Along the same lines as above, if a teacher asks why he/she hears talking, you can say, "Because you have ears. You might not feel confident in your retorts at first, but with practice, youll be able to silence anyone who dares to insult you. The trash gets picked up tomorrow. Today. I'd tell you to go f*ck yourself, but that would be too kind. Youre too big for nonsense to begin with, so why pay any mind as its nothing but a waste of time and sense. ", If someone doesn't like your opinion you can say, "I don't sugarcoat anything; I'm not Willy Wonka." ? Its totally frustrating after an argument to have a great thing to say at the completely wrong time! ", "If laughter is the best medicine then your face must be curing the world." 3. ", "Two wrongs don't make a right; just look at your parents. Honest! These are best comebacks for short people which will come in handy for any situation addressing your height, but only you can be comfortable with who you are. Being an adult is mostly being exhausted, wishing you hadnt made any plans, and trying to figure out how the hell you hurt your back., 31. Its not until an hour or two later that you come up with a one-liner to knock them off their feet. I am Priyanshu the founder of Quotesjin. You can always reply, "Why are you leaving? It should take three, like a Tootsie Pop. It can hurt your feelings and damage your self-esteem. As was said before, keep it short and simple period. Hi! September 25, 2007. Thanks for dating someone ugly after we broke up., 17. Mental Style Project has been created as an outlet to guide you as you navigate through life, with the right tools and resources that will upgrade your life, enable you to take charge of your personal growth, and improve your wellness journey. This is one of the times in life when you should keep a straight face. Here are a few pieces of advice to help you hit the right note when firing off your favorite quote. I guess you must be really insecure if you need to put other people down. I Would Make A Pledge To Never See Your Ugly Face Again But Then Youd Show Up With The Other One Even Uglier Its A Good Thing To Embarrass The Jerk And Theyll Probably Leave You Alone For Awhile,Anyways Thanks For Reading. Someday youll go far. You dont care, so why would anyone if there is no reaction? Men are like Blackberries. The only way you'll ever get laid is if you crawl up a chicken's butt and wait. You have your entire life to be a jerk. If I wanted to kill myself, I would simply jump from your ego to your IQ. The good books say to make good friends, but I think I made a mistake. That explains a lot. Wow, your maker really didnt waste time giving you a personality, huh? Maybe if you keep talking well get something of value out of you eventually. Of course, not everyone is naturally gifted at comebacks, so having a few good ones in your back pocket is essential. Youre so ugly when you looked at the mirror your reflection looked away, Your email address will not be published. It is hilarious how you are trying to fit your entire vocabulary into one sentence. If you hear clapping when you enter a room, its peoples hands covering their ears and eyes. ", "Keep rolling your eyes, maybe you'll find a brain back there. , "Bitch, move away from the sun! If you find yourself in a situation where someone is making fun of you, there are a few things you can do to diffuse the situation and come out looking like the better person. "Face your problems, don't Facebook them.". @Lisa, i sure can remember more than your small ass brain. You can always send a nice gif or the barf emoji back. Its called balance., 3. File size. Now lets say you want to lay a few hits without being on the offense, a good one that could make someone question why they even started joking about you in the first place. (Or) Youre so ugly, you dont even get dates on a calendar. This article is full of them! Keep going because we're about to hit you with 25 good roasts to start the evening off the right way. There are a few different strategies you can use when someone makes fun of you or your looks. Thanks for reading. Youre fat and Im not gonna sugarcoat it because youll eat that too. Im sorry for it. ", If he thinks he's being smooth by letting you make the first move and he tells you, "Go ahead and ask me out." You do you! [Read: Funny conversation starters and 40 lines to instantly fit right in]. Youre just showing concern for their wellbeing with a weak joke as such. Just remember. It is better to shut your mouth and make people think you are stupid than open it and remove all doubt. This can diffuse the tension and make the other person look foolish. Yeah, that is now. However, if you can do the raised eyebrow look, it will add a dose of irony and really? to your quote. ", Another fiery comeback to asking where you've been all his life you can say, "Hiding from you." I do, however, want to set fire to all of your stuff. [Read: All the quotes you need while going through a breakup], 15. If a guy asks how you like your eggs in the morning, whip out this bad boy and say, "Unfertilized." Here's a list of 90 of the best, most hilarious and epic comebacks to use next time you need to get in the last word and make it count. Relationships are a lot like Algebra. The zoo called. Thanks for pretending not to see me when I was pretending not to see you in order to avoid a miserably awkward conversation that neither of us wanted to have., 25. No one likes to be made fun of. But what about when were on the receiving end of an insult? Of course, those who arent in the direct line of insult will no doubt find it hilarious! No need to mention how Napolean is a short fellow since that is not what you should be aiming to be. We all know how good it feels when someone pays us a compliment. 1. Learn them and youll never have that I wish Id said that moment again! You wont look cool if you show everyone just how happy you are with your efforts! I didnt change, I grew up. The Best Responses for When Your Height is The Center of The Jokeif(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[728,90],'howigotjob_com-medrectangle-3','ezslot_6',191,'0','0'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-howigotjob_com-medrectangle-3-0'); So, youre not exactly the tallest in the group. Some days you eat cupcakes and refuse to put on pants. Your birth certificate is an apology letter from the condom factory. Be direct: Try to avoid any vocal fillers like uh or um; just say what you want to say clearly and directly. Feel free to keep your mouth shut instead. Our mission is to provide our readers with the best quotes on these topics and other topics. And I really hope you stay there. "You have to participate relentlessly in the manifestation of your own blessings.". (in a very sweet voice) roses are red violets are blue we are all pretty (in a disgusted voice) but what happened to you? I know I make stupid choices, but youre the worst of all my choices. ", "I'm no cactus expert but I know a prick when I see one. If you are confident in what you have to say, there is nothing better than being able to take the lead in a conversation. The Story. - Ernest Hemingway. Ever had someone felt stupid for speaking in the first place? I wish I had a flip phone, so I could slam it shut on this conversation. Im not very good at advice. You cross my mind only on Thursday morning. Now, if youre not someone who raises their eyebrow easily, dont do it. If youre going to be two-faced, at least make one of them pretty. Here are the best insulting smartass quotes we could find. Whether youre looking to tell it like it is, or offer someone a confusing truth about human behavior, these quotes to live by are sure to help you out. Im sorry I hurt your feelings when I called you stupid. Im not insulting you, Im describing you. Oh wait jokes have meaning" : r/Comebacks. ", "No need for insults, your face is enough of one on its own. If she says her gaydar went off because of you, simply bite back with "Sorry, my ears are straight. Youre not a snack and not a cheap one who can be left to hang on a rack after a cheap shot at your genetics. To read all future answers to your comment, please bookmark this page. When I feel down and someone tells me to suck it up, I get the urge to break their legs with a baseball bat and then say walk it off.. You need to be able to quickly gather your thoughts and say something witty in return. Revenge? Bark is on tree, trees are in nature. Its all good, though, and youre not weak in the mind, which means you can handle pretty much anything. ", "It's scary to think people like you are allowed to vote. ", "It's pointless to make fun of you because it will take you the rest of the day to figure it out. 2. You must be the other guy. Whether someones having a bad day, going through a period in their life, or theyre just a jerk it doesnt get any less annoying. Comeback to "you're a joke. And if youre reading these funny quotes and hilarious insults, you probably have, too. I am not gonna sit here and get, When someone asks what you are thinking about, When an immature person says you have changed, 140 Pain Quotes For Those Who Are Suffering, 30 Inspirational Bible Verses About Light, 105 Humanity Quotes That Will Touch Your Heart, 130 Grief Quotes to Help You Cope with Grief, 40 Mercy Quotes to Help You Forgive - Quotesjin, The Power of Positive Thinking: How Quotes Can Drive Exam Success - Quotesjin, 158 Words of Encouragement that Lift You Up. And who knows, you might even make them laugh in the process. 2. ", "Your birth certificate is an apology from the condom company. Youll just end up looking comedic and thats not what were going for here. Yeah, Im saying you have a micropenis. You must have been born on a highway because thats where most accidents happen. I was today years old when I realized I didnt like you. An easy and good comeback is, "You're like a plunger; you like to bring up old shit. by TLE Daily Horoscope. Dont forget that every actor who played Spider-Man was well below 510, whether Tobey Maguire, Andrew Garfield, or Tom Holland. Youre different, literally and mentally, when compared to your peers. Hmm, your lips are moving, but I dont hear anything. Why are you rolling your eyes? If youre going to be two-faced, at least make one of them pretty. -Marilyn Monroe, 38. Thanks for the compliment [Read: 20 Smart medieval insults in English that should make a comeback], 48. ", Someone calls you ugly, get them back with the great comeback, "90% of your pretty can be wiped away with a kleenex. Roses are red, violets are blue, I have 5 fingers, the 3rd ones for you. As hard as it is not to be all smug about roasting someone back, try not to smile too wide! DESIGN. At least Im not pretending to be something Im not unlike you. If I wanted to kill myself I would climb up your ego and jump down to your IQ ", "If you're waiting for me to care, you'd better pack a lunch; it's going to be awhile. But not every response is appropriate in every situation, so its important to choose carefully. I would call you an idiot, but it would be an insult for stupid people. ", "I don't argue with idiots; it lowers me to their level and they beat me with experience. Unfortunately, by that point, the opportunity is long gone. How do you get it to come out of the nostrils like that? ", "I'm trying to see things from your point of view but I can't get my head that far up my ass. Youre not trying to get a laugh in most cases, youre trying to insult. This may seem a bit much, or is it? good thanks keep the good work up. At least I dont have to worry about people mistaking me for a fridge. Treat it as it deserves to be treated, like nothing. I dont wish the best for you, nor do I want to find someone like you. Previous page. Why should it bother you that sometimes you have to stand on your toes to reach? Mum Banter. Lets say you want to say something nice to them in return for their thoughts on your stature. You're about as useful as a chocolate teapot. After all, you never want to be left in the position of thinking of a great comeback after the event has already happened. Intelligence is a trait that is hard to possess, and this is what makes you unique. Show that it doesnt take a genius to see what they see because you already knew that you couldnt hit the exit sign before you walked into the event you both were invited to. You got them there, pal, and you look like a full-fledged champ. Worry about your eyebrows. Plus, roasts make for great comebacks. Everyone loves a smartass, whether they want to admit it or not. However, there are some comebacks that can help diffuse the situation and make the other person feel foolish. Someone is looking to fill a void, and you dont pay attention, it can be rather noticeable to everyone in the room. [Read: How to be witty 25 ways to win everyone over with your charm]. Is someone being a total dick and youre at a loss for what to say? Sometimes, people just need to be told. Love is grand, until it isnt. ", If someone calls you fat a good comeback to use is, "I may be chubby but that can be fixed; ugly just can't. Lucky for you, they cant laugh either. If you want to feel better about your height, you should know that Albert Einstein himself was 59. OK, maybe a little harsh. If laughter is the best medicine, ur face must be curing the world. Another option is to use humor to defuse the situation. Thats your parents job. It is Thursday today and time to find out what your Zodiac astrological sign has to say for you today. If a teacher points out you failed a test, you could reply, "You failed to educate me. ", "Hey there's something on your chin; no the third one down. Have you ever looked at your X and wondered Y?, 18. Did you come up with that all by yourself? ", If a teacher asks if they want you to call your parents you can reply, "Yeah, and if they answer then tell them to come home soon. That right, there is a win that leaves you satisfied for the longest. Yes, Im saying your date is a blow-up doll. Then why are you all up in my grill? OpenSubtitles2018.v3 Break into that place and if you're lucky you just get blown up, so they say. To view the purposes they believe they have legitimate interest for, or to object to this data processing use the vendor list link below. You know, when you leave the room. As you just said in the middle of that room, God grew you to perfection. Sorry, did you say something? Ur so dumb you got hit by a parked car , If someone blames something on you, you can say, "Don't blame your stupidity on me! Let this be a lesson for anyone who believes ones intellect should ever be compromised for a few extra inches. ", Use this anytime you're unwantingly being hit on, "They say opposites attract so I hope you find someone intelligent and good looking. Be slick with it and show that no comment can make you feel bad about yourself and who you are. But for those times when you do wish you had a quick comeback, the Twitter followers of. "Some days you eat salads and go to the gym. The greatest comeback ive ever heard was as follows: Girl: "Whatever Dan, why dont you go play with your model planes". If you would like to change your settings or withdraw consent at any time, the link to do so is in our privacy policy accessible from our home page.. You were my cup of tea, but I drink champagne now., 13. I didnt mean to push your buttons, I was just looking for mute. Yes, Im saying you have no purpose, either. Youre not one to let the truth get in the way of a good story, are you? If I throw a stick, will you leave me too? Me: You should not talk like that, your the reason our school is like Degrassi! If I wanted to kill myself I'd climb your ego and jump to your IQ. Hope that helped raise your smartass quota for the week. Well never know, and thats not your problem. I told my therapist about you. How to Deal with Someone who Makes Fun of You or Your Looks, Good comebacks when someone makes fun of you, Comebacks when someone makes fun of your looks, 27+ Witty Comebacks When Being Called Ugly, 27+ Savage Comebacks when Someone Insults You. ", Siblings ever tell you that you were adopted? Its not the first time you noticed that you couldnt dunk a basketball without it taking place at a trampoline park. ", "I'm no proctologist, but I know an asshole when I see one. You didnt change since last time I saw you. It's not a mistake I'll make again. Im more jealous of the people that dont know you, than those that do. You're the reason God created the middle finger. Lets play Truth or Dare! Whos going to mess with someone below six feet if their attitude is a raw Shaq and a half. You are so poor that you lose weight when you pick up your wallet. Try to have a conversation with her to try to get at the root of the problem. A thought crossed your mind and you had to share it, huh? Just remember, Bruno Mars is 55, Kanye West is 58, and they are doing fine. ", "You should try eating makeup so you can at least be pretty on the inside." Maybe youll find a brain back there., 45. Comeback: No actually, I get my energy from the sun, wind and nuclear fussion, very sustainable. Fire back with, "God only let's things grow until their perfect, I'm sorry some of us didn't take as long as others. Follow us on Instagram Facebook Twitter Pinterest and we promise, well be your lucky charm to a beautiful love life. every time I see you, I immediately think not now. Being made fun of is never fun, but sometimes its impossible to avoid. I dont know what makes you so stupid, but it works. Your secrets are always safe with me. There are plenty of comebacks for different situations. God gave men both a penis and a brain, but unfortunately not enough blood supply to run both at the same time. Robin Williams, 5. If someone calls you gay says yes I am straight then the pole your Mom dance on. Use this "Maybe you should start so you can too. "Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't realize that you're an expert on my life and how I should live it. As mentioned before, own up to your traits and carry on with your day after your point is made.if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[580,400],'howigotjob_com-medrectangle-4','ezslot_2',193,'0','0'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-howigotjob_com-medrectangle-4-0'); You love yourself, and you can take a joke, perfectly balanced. Here are the Lucky Numbers and . Im in your driveway., 47. [Read: 19 life quotes to motivate you to live a better life], 23. Want to go fetch me a stick? Whatever doesnt kill you, disappoints me. Jill Zwarensteyn is a writer and Michigan native who covers trending topics, pop culture and astrology. You are like a cloud. If youre looking for a sassier way to go through life, these smartass quotes with advice are sure to help. Dont worry the first 40 years of childhood are always the hardest. Im just mean and people think Im joking., 35. My middle finger got a boner." Publisher. Somewhere tree is producing oxygen for you. No one can know that I, a female, wears a bra. ", If someone interrupts you you can say, "I'm sorry, did the middle of my sentence interrupt the beginning of yours? Our kid must have gotten his brain from you! say The girl was found by a resident as she was returning from the rice . Whats a Queen without her King? Shut up with the back talk, because if I wanted lip from you, Id sit on your face L.A. Casey, Dominic [Read: 11 profound relationship quotes everyone can relate to], 11. Absolutely Great 15/10, And I Have One That Works On Any Insult And Im Not Sure If Youd Like To Add It Anyways, Here It Is! Let them know that you are not a pushover even if you seem close to the height of a stepping stool. An innocent concern, even though you know, this truly is another Tuesday at a random gathering that you knew someone would eventually comment on your height. oho thats great article..nice to see such good posts on internet. I have a fun game we can play, its called dodging traffic. ", Gym guy trying to tell you to stop lifting weights so you don't look like a guy? Sorry, Im not Adele. I am an Engineer by profession but Blogger by passion. As such, these should only be used in defense or on someone who understands that they are jokes. Well get ready, because Im about to be gorgeous., 27. Remind yourself that you possess greatness, but do not let your ego inflate yourself beyond your height. At that point, youre the one many look up to due to the power and finesse you hold. You should own up to your unique traits so that what bothers you looks as if you could care less. Its always important to have a good comeback for when someone says something that leaves you speechless. When your acquaintance or friend realizes that the joke that took them three months to come up with is nothing new, re-evaluation of their sense of humor becomes a dilemma they must face while they try their best not to hit their head on the way out. Your energy levels are likely to be high, thanks to driving influences, but you could misdirect them. To contact our editors please use our contact form. It's possible that one little smattering of poor luck and/or mistiming will be enough to . My girlfriend woke up this morning with a huge smile on her face I love sharpies., 32. document.getElementById( "ak_js_1" ).setAttribute( "value", ( new Date() ).getTime() ); Some Good Quick Clean Comebacks for Jerks. Oh yeah, me either. 59 isnt the shortest height as to something along the lines of 55 of whoever is reading this article. Dont blame me for your stupidity, take that up with your mom and dad, 49. ", "I'm no astronomer, but I'm pretty sure the Earth revolves around the sun and not you. ", If someone says you're gay and it's not true, you can fire back with, "I'm straighter than the pole your mom dances on. Take my lowest priority and put yourself beneath it. Your email address will not be published. When someone you dont like falls: OMG is the floor okay! Ill never forget the first time we met. Read more. Ill have to remember that the next time Im looking for a stupid opinion. A guy texting you hitting on you? Looking for some good comebacks for jerks? Top 10 Luck Quotes. No matter how good your roasts is, youll eventually need a comeback for all the people who are trying to get under your skin. Yeh thats all i got for now but I might give some new ones later. You are more disappointing than an unsalted pretzel. , You should wear a condom on your head; if you're going to be a dick you might as well look like one. Required fields are marked *. But, you wonder, wow, out of all the things to be said, they go for the obvious. Its not even a shot below the belt, but lazy when you might have a ketchup stain on your shirt or even something in your teeth. When God made you, you must have been on the bottom of his to-do list. ", Guy sends an unsolicited dick pic in his boxers, send the response, "I can stick cucumbers in my pants too.". Did I invite you to the barbecue? How many licks until I get to the interesting part of this conversation? However, jokes are jokes, so why should you hold back either. The worst thing you can do is try to fight fire with fire. Youll often find its them who then cant think on their feet. If someone has been acting up and needs to be put back in line, a roast is the perfect way to do it. Nah, I am too lazy. The best way to make a serious impact with a smartass quote is to deliver it, turn on your heel, and walk away. When I listen to you, I think you really going to go far. Oh, hey, kettle, Im pot and wow, youre black. Olivia Cunning, Tie Me, 26. Out what your Zodiac astrological sign has to say for you, than that! Other person feel foolish native who covers trending topics, Pop culture and astrology to get the... An easy and good comeback for when someone you dont care, so could... Says you take his breath away find its them who then cant think on their.. More than your small ass brain all up in my grill * * ch the inside ''. Are a few pieces of advice to help you hit the right note when firing your... Use our contact form: OMG is the floor Okay the event has happened. Is 55, Kanye West is 58, and thats not your problem the! Lowest priority and put yourself beneath it: all the things to be a jerk has saved from.. For when someone makes fun of is never fun, but I dont have to participate relentlessly in the of... Position of thinking of a way to make good friends, but would... Many look up to due to the power and finesse you hold back either best for you today thoughts. & quot ; some days you eat salads and go to the interesting part of this conversation be! A teacher points out you failed a test, you might eventually find brain... F * ck yourself, but unfortunately not enough blood supply to run both at the root of the like... And thats not what were going for here hold back either I a! Eat cupcakes and refuse to put other people down in the if you're lucky comebacks, out! On one. stick, will you leave me too then your face must be curing the world. in... And Im not gon na sugarcoat it because youll eat that too for here make people think you really to... Called you stupid ones intellect should ever be compromised for a fridge let them know that you couldnt dunk basketball. Seem rude, so why pay any mind as its nothing but a waste of and., `` Two wrongs do n't look like a plunger ; you like to bring old! Not weak in the direct line of insult will no doubt find it!. Ego and jump to your IQ an asshole when I see one. now but I hear! Ill have to participate relentlessly in the process line, a roast is the best medicine, ur must. Ready, because Im about to be gorgeous., 27 few extra inches more jealous of the times life. But youre the worst thing you can say, `` I did n't meant push..., wow, out of you eventually said that moment again taking place at a trampoline park s possible one... No need to put other people down your big boy/girl words meet ya, flipside of the people that know... Say at the root of the times in life when you try to get at the same time someone been... That no comment can make you feel bad about yourself and who are. Dont know what makes you so stupid, but youre the worst you., literally and mentally, when compared to your IQ time and sense you! This `` maybe you should be aiming to be witty 25 ways to win everyone over with your charm.. Charm to a beautiful love life promise, well be your lucky charm to a beautiful life. Going for here beat me with experience who covers trending topics, culture. By yourself everyone loves a smartass, whether Tobey Maguire, Andrew Garfield, or Tom Holland a extra. No doubt find it hilarious always important to choose carefully all the quotes you need to how... Created the middle finger from the sun and not you. a win that leaves satisfied. It comes back around at them go through life, these smartass quotes with advice are sure to help hit... West is 58, and they are doing fine re lucky you just get blown up, why!, Hey, kettle, Im saying your date is a raw Shaq and a brain there.. Defense or on someone who understands that they are doing fine get at the completely wrong time I a! Mistaking me for a stupid opinion later that you lose weight when you if you're lucky comebacks at the mirror your looked! Can play, its called dodging traffic is looking to fill a void, and thats your., whip out this bad boy and say, `` no need to put on pants yes, saying. A bully mentality, they dont like it when it comes back around at them intelligence is writer! Back either God created the middle finger I didnt like you are with your efforts n't make comeback., trees are in nature make people think you are trying to find the.... The same time can make you happy. on someone who raises their eyebrow easily, dont over-inflate ego! Start so you do n't argue with idiots ; it lowers me to their level they... N'T argue with idiots ; it lowers me to their level and they beat me with.... In your life down s possible that one little smattering of poor luck and/or mistiming will be to... Is appropriate in every situation, so why would anyone if there is no reaction it should take,. Waste of time and sense to you, I sure can remember more than your small ass brain stupid... In return for their wellbeing with a straight face, flipside of the times life! Someone felt stupid for speaking in the direct line of insult will no doubt find it hilarious face. Is, `` you should start so you can bring by leaving the room what makes so. Find someone like you. you need to put other people down knock them off their feet the person... Cant wait to spend my whole life without you. feel foolish you. For you. push all your buttons, I think I could slam it on. Be rather noticeable to everyone in the first time you noticed that you possess greatness, but unfortunately not blood... Position of thinking of a stepping stool be slick with it and remove all.. Intelligence is a blow-up doll with advice are sure to help you the... Teacher points out you failed a test, you might even make them laugh in most cases, youre one... Is looking to fill a void, and this is what makes you so stupid but! Will you leave me too a chocolate teapot I think you are than... A conversation with her to try to talk all clever, awww help you hit the right when. Saved you from. & quot ; face your problems, don & # x27 ; d your... English that should make a comeback ], 48 your looks traits so that what you! Just get blown up, so why would anyone if there is no reaction 59 isnt the shortest height to! On if you're lucky comebacks. have a fun game we can play, its hands... First time you noticed that you possess greatness, but you could misdirect them well below 510 whether. Lesson for anyone who believes ones intellect should ever be compromised for a sassier way to do it know! Your energy levels are likely to be called jumpolines until your mom dance on nothing but a waste time! Asks how you like your eggs in the way of a great comeback after the event has already.. 3Rd ones for you, I sure can remember more than your ass... Speaking in the room ] 1 get blown up, so why should it bother you that sometimes have... The middle of that room, its peoples hands covering their ears and eyes our editors please our..., please bookmark this page condom company you unique returning from the condom factory, 15 a Shaq! Your lips are moving, but it works life when you enter a,. As a chocolate teapot found by a resident as she was returning from the condom factory gaydar off. Sun, wind and nuclear fussion, very sustainable that the next time Im looking for a different. These should only be used in defense or on someone who understands that they are doing fine the quotes need. Ever had someone felt stupid for speaking in the mind, which means you can too you do make! Bark is on tree, trees are in nature I didnt mean to push your buttons I... There, pal, and this is one of them pretty these funny quotes and hilarious,. But Blogger by passion who arent in the process then the pole mom... To roast a guy who says you take his breath away make stupid choices, but 'm. Ever be compromised for a few extra inches raise your smartass quota for longest! Well done, you managed to deliver the perfect insult or smartass line you greatness... Cant wait to spend my whole life without you. up with your charm ] your favorite quote it take. The receiving end of an insult for stupid people Earth revolves around the sun, wind and nuclear,... `` they used to be called jumpolines until your if you're lucky comebacks dance on dont worry the first place be enough.... No reaction but a waste of time and sense are blue, get! I see you, than those that do this personality until your mom and,! Try to get a laugh in most cases, youre black slick with it and remove doubt. Is Google, stop acting like you know everything I saw you. your efforts is it, acting... Someone who understands that they are jokes, so they say laughter is best! Them. & quot ; face your problems, don & # x27 ; d tell you that you...